for ladyelleth: sea-longing

[koulagirl666.livejournal.com]

Sea-longing
for: ladyelleth
pairing: Idril/Elwing (implied)
rating: PG
summary: Idril leaves the city sometimes, just to get away. She isn't always the only one.

Idril hates the way everyone looks at her, like it's her fault somehow that all this happened. In a way, it's freeing; better to be blamed and allowed to move freely than be reined in and held in high regard, but that it has to be this way grates on her nerves until they fray and she has to get away until she can face them again. She lost just as much as they did; her aunt and cousin and parents and way of life vanished in a puff like a candle going out. She is the wick - blackened, thin and fragile, with the beeswax still melting as it flees her.

She likes to sit here now; it's her secret place, where she can just be. The wind touches her hair gently, and she lets it free.

'Can I sit with you?' Elwing is still so young, and has already seen so much; Idril doesn't have the heart to turn her away. She moves over instead; there's room on the rock for two, just barely, and the sea and sky are there for all.

'Do you think you'll ever sail West?' she says, once she has sat, careful not to touch like she knows that this place casts its own peaceful spell.

'I don't know,' Idril answers, honestly despite the small twist in her stomach that says 'home' every time she looks out to the coast. 'I like it here.'

'Me too,' Elwing says, and looks out to sea. 'I'm glad I came here.'

There's nothing else to say. The sky turns to purple and red and fades to darkness; the stars flicker dully. It doesn't grow cold; nobody comes looking for them here.

'I'd like to be able to fly,' Elwing says, suddenly, when the silence grows too comfortable and Idril has long accepted that this is no intrusion. 'It would be nice to go where I want to, and see everything from so high that it all looks pretty no matter what is happening.'

'That's a good wish.' She tries to imagine it; but all she can think of is falling. 'I don't think I could do it though.'

But she can see past her own pain, out here; past the empty docks and the towers and stalls selling things she doesn't really need, not now.

She sees herself.

'Let's walk back together,' she says, and Elwing tenses.

'Not yet.'

She puts an arm around Elwing's shoulders and waits.

It's nice to not be alone, even though she can't keep secrets to herself anymore. They're not her own, now that she knows that Elwing feels the same things, sometimes. This thing that was too big to be kept within herself is easy to bear between them; and if Elwing looks to the West with the same longing she feels, then it is nothing that they can't understand without words.

Like everything; it doesn't last, once things change around them. She likes to think, though, that it meant something, even just for those moments they stole.

Comments

[ladyelleth.livejournal.com]

This works so beautifully - Idril/Elwing is not a pairing I ever imagined, but it makes a lot of sense all things in their (actually rather similar) histories considered - and Idril's sense of freedom as both a burden and a curse likewise does. You write beautifully. The prose, the descriptions, the ideas in this, I am having goosebumps all over; this made me smile throughout, and made a very dull, snowless morning a lot brighter. Thank you, and (if you celebrate), happy holidays. ♥

[koulagirl666.livejournal.com]

I also hope you had a happy end-of-year-holiday. =)

I'm glad you like it; that it worked for you. That's the best compliment ever. Thank you.

[foxrafer.livejournal.com]

I really like the mood in this piece; there's this interesting sense of things left unsaid by both of them but that they both still hear very clearly. You show that feeling of longing very clearly and eloquently throughout this. It's really lovely.

[koulagirl666.livejournal.com]

Thank you! They don't really need to talk because part of the comfort comes from the fact that they don't need to, y'know? I'm glad you get that. Thanks again.

:)

[caraloup.livejournal.com]

No, I never would have imagined Idril/Elwing as a pairing either, but may I say that it's delightful to see two female characters moved into the spotlight for once? :) Also, I love the image of the wick that says so much about Idril in so few words!

[koulagirl666.livejournal.com]

They were a joy to write as well! Thank you for reading and commenting. =)